I am lying in bed, just fucked and feeling that someone inside me is deeply satisfied. It’s not the lover who wanted to marry or rest my head in a man’s chest. Not the player who loves to joust with a man. Not Little One, she still fiercely loves that other guy. I try for a while to dismiss the feeling with shame. But her beam burns through.
It’s the junkie. And she is in her version of love.
And although she has an affinity always for the man with the wrong resume, at least she is something of a connoisseur. She likes them breathtakingly beautiful. She likes an elegance to their [...]
Posted on 26 November 2013 | 2:22 pm
After a period of negotiation because I refuse to use spirit names, we agreed. I would call him Buddy Love. He would call me Lady Libido. He asks me how I am after “the split”. “Low key” I respond, “and yet, it’s pleasurably destabilizing”.
It feels like a big oak tree was removed from my center. There’s a big gaping trembling hole. A hole that I work very hard to not fill back up. To not use as a new place for land fill. I’m not sure what the goal of love is but I am pretty sure that the goal of an ending is to become well acquainted with emptiness. The kind of quiet you get [...]
Posted on 23 October 2013 | 9:47 pm
One day you may discover the sweet glories of gravity On the floor with limbs useless Dreams of flight neatly placed back into the” futile” file
Everything might come into question the way water collects at the drain simply waiting Filled again with dreams Now emptying out
You might move more slowly Through a mind no longer familiar The hesitance of a tourist Piled high with gear aimed to set you in the direction Of a known that does not exist
You might count small blessings Little birds Like the fact that falling is no longer a question
Posted on 22 October 2013 | 2:50 pm